Sleeping Heads

I am seated in a bus to Lagos, feeling like a ball in a game of ping pong, just that I have to avoid being hit.

The batons are the heads of the individuals seated beside me. And I am forced to dodge being hit by their sleeping swinging heads.

And the score is 1-0 the first hit delivered from the man on the left, and it’s just 15minutes into the journey can I possibly hope to dodge any more hits before the game is over. I hope so.

No, the guy on the left just got a hit in leaving the game 2-0, Advantage Server.

The situation of the roads helps to contribute to the intricacy of the game. From the countless potholes that the driver dodges left and right to avoid entering, to having to choose which of the potholes are a lesser evil.

I am forced to continue this game of sleeping heads, its 20minutes before halftime when the driver will park by the roadside for undisciplined passengers to have a pissing contest on the side of a major expressway.

After some careful manoeuvrings the man on the right gets a hit, despite apologizing for hit number 2 leaving the opponents a very good advance with a 3-0 lead.

I wonder who's gonna get the first hat trick, @audience place your bets now. Just as if the guy on the right can hear my thoughts from the deep recesses of his open mouthed sleep he gets a hit in.

The game is progressing quite well, thankfully it looks like the guy on the left is not going to score any more hits since he appears wide awake.

And our man of the match at the moment gets another hit, leaving the game at 5-0.

I wonder what it would take for me to get a hit in, because anything I do would be paramount to revenge. Well the other option would be to pretend to be asleep so that I change from being the ball to a baton

No, am too much of a pacifist to do that.

And the option of revenge would most likely blow up in my face, what can a skinny all bones individual like me do in a fist fight?

Well except a miracle of Darman repeats itself I am going get crushed in this game.

After more careful dodges on my part the guy on the right gets two consecutive hits in leaving the game at a 7-0 lead, disadvantage receiver. It’s almost a few more minutes into that halftime I spoke about earlier.

And it looks like the game is going to end, as the guy on the right has finally gotten a good sleeping position

We have reached the end of the game and I want to thank all of you that for sticking to the end of the commentary. From yours truly SultanWais.

To my dear hosts; the caretakers of the Lagos-Ibadan expressway (whoever that is or if it exists) get the road fixed or the railway working effectively to international standard rather than beating your chests over restoring a deadbeat train.  So that people like me won't be forced to participate in a game of sleeping heads.